Month: July 2014

An open letter to Caleb Reynolds from Big Brother 16.

I never really talk about my Big Brother obsession because not many of my friends actually watch the show but I just have to say something here because WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, MAN.

1st of all, Amber told you within a few days of entering the house that she liked you as a friend. Period. She flat out said that she didn’t think of you the way you think of her. That should have been the end of your made up “relationship” but somehow in your mind that registered as “she just doesn’t want to talk about it in front of cameras but she actually likes me”. No.

All the live feeders watched in disgust as you basically tricked her into going on a “date”. The level of uncomfortable from her for that hour was so horrible I actually had to stop watching after about 15 minutes and wasn’t able to come back to it for almost a full day because it made ME uncomfortable. PROTIP: When a girl tells you she doesn’t see you in a romantic light, don’t talk about how excited you are for your parents to meet, then talk about your wedding, then insist she go on a week long cruise with you after she’s just been forced to spend 90 days in a house locked up with your obsessive behavior.

The thing that finally prompted me to write this letter was your recent “game move”. Let me be clear. That “game move” was a classic case of mental/emotional ABUSE. Yes, ABUSE.

After 50+ days of putting up with your ridiculous obsession with her (seriously, taking her clothes to wear around the house and stealing her crap to sleep with at night is BEYOND creep, man) and she stopped talking to you altogether, you decided that you needed to “teach her a lesson”. So you told Frankie to put her on the block so she’d be “so scared she’d be forced to come running back to you”.

SERIOUSLY? If you ever manage to get a girl to go out with you outside that house I will be flabbergasted. Also, understand that FORCING a girl to do ANYTHING is pretty much the epitome of a fucking douchebag. If a girl stops talking to you then just LEAVE HER THE FUCK ALONE. Don’t play games and mentally screw with her to FORCE her to be nice to you again.

But thank you, I guess? My almost 16 year old daughter loves to watch the show with me and I’ve been able to use your behavior as a great example of the kind of guy you NEVER want to date EVER.

Friday of last week Ben called and asked me if I’d be interested in staying at the Presidential Suite of the Marriott Marquis in San Francisco for a night while he had to be there for company business. I agreed immediately as long as I didn’t have to call him Mr. President. Originally we were only supposed to stay on Tuesday night but last minute they needed him there a day early so we got to stay Monday and Tuesday night and OMG YOU GUYS! PRESIDENTIAL SUITE!

This was pretty much a once in a life time opportunity. The cost of this room PER NIGHT was almost TWICE our MONTHLY mortgage. It flabbergasts me that there are people that have that kind of money to spend and I certainly didn’t mind getting to pretend to be one for a few nights.

I didn’t get great shots of most of the suite because they were showing product in the downstairs portion that I couldn’t photograph but I got some the second night after they had cleaned all that up. I had SUCH a great time getting to explore San Francisco all on my own for the day but will save that for another post. For now, take a look at how the 1% live.

This is just inside the front door looking right. It’s one of two sitting rooms and farther back is the dining room.

Here is the same room standing across from the front door. The door on the right is a half bath and the door on the left is kind of a “butlers kitchen”. Seriously.

The bag on the table contains a piece of pecan pie and a gigantic chocolate chip cookie. Just saying.

Here’s the dining room which was kind of a mess because Ben’s coworkers and a bunch of reviewers had been in and out all day long. That window on the left had a great view of The Metreon where we are always going to see IMAX movies and the Moscone Center where Apple likes to announce all it’s fun new toys!

This is the living room, bar, and front door. Behind me is the stairs to the only bedroom.

Here are the stairs and the massive window that I spent HOURS staring out.

And here is the bedroom. It was FABULOUS! We spent quite a bit of time laying in bed and staring out the window not quite believing that we were actually there in that room.

And lastly, the bathroom. THE BATHROOM. Apparently the 1% like warm butt showers.

So there ya go! I still can’t believe we had the opportunity to stay there for FREE and I’m glad that I’ve been better lately about not WORRYING (work, dogs, Cassidy) and saying YES to things that I’d normally pass by because of all those silly things that will totally work themselves out. Work isn’t going anywhere (I have 180 HOURS of PTO!) and Cassidy is more than capable at 15 (almost 16 OMG) of taking care of the dogs for two days while we are gone. When I was her age I was staying home for longer times alone with a dog, cats, AND a 6 year old little brother to take care of!

I’ve dropped about 12,039,429,348 hints to Ben to try and get more chances to do demos and go to trade shows so that I can tag along more. There is one in Spain that I’d LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE if he were able to go because work would pay for his ticket and hotel room and all we’d have to pay for is my ticket! YES PLEASE! Fingers crossed!