I was telling Ben this morning how silly the girls are here at work. The ones that didn’t get flowers make sure to point it out and the girls that DID get flowers all say how “if he’d LISTEN for once he’d know I prefer YELLOW roses.” Or, “Yeah, that’s just what I need, more chocolate!”.
I feel sad for these girls. Sad that these women (who are ALL older than me) place so much value on such trivial crap. Like, choose to see the BRIGHT side of things. For ONCE. If he sent you chocolate he must not think your thighs are as big as you do, because if he did he’d have sent a box of Slim Fast. THAT would have been something worth complaining about!
During this talk I told Ben how lucky it makes me feel that we have eachother. Mainly, that I have him.
Benjamin: why all the kisses?
me: Well, I listen to the girls here find reasons to complain about Valentines Day and it makes me realize how lucky I am
Benjamin: well, I haven’t done anything today
so, how are you lucky today?
me: It doesn’t matter. You do things all the time
Benjamin: I do?
So, why am I lucky? Let’s see…
1) I found The One. Knowing that with such certainty is a powerful feeling. Before Ben, I started to believe that feeling was just a myth. Something in movies and cheap paperback romance novels.
3) Ben has stepped up and proven to be a better father to my daughter than I ever thought ANY man could be. See, here’s the thinking positive part. I sometimes think that he’s too strict. I’m the lenient one, he’s the hard ass. That’s how our roles play out. BUT! He does these things, like coming home after a long day and sitting in shitty traffic for an hour and the first thing he does when he walks in is pay attention to Cassidy. Like, we exchange Hello’s, maybe kiss, or a ‘how was the drive’. But then he takes time to check on her. Is your homework done? Is your room clean? How was school? What did you learn today? Did anything funny happen? Have you figured out that quantum physics problem yet?
And I admit, there are days where I’m like, HELLO!! ME!! REMEMBER ME, ANNA, YOUR FIANCE, I HAD A GOOD DAY AND MY ROOM IS CLEAN AND LET ME TELL YOU THIS FUNNY STORY ABOUT THAT ONE GIRL WHOS BLOG I READ!!! But he does this because he loves her and he wants her to learn about being responsible and dependable and self reliant. Her future and the person she grows into is important to him. Cassidy and I are very lucky that he is a part of our lives.
4) He’s a bigger geek than I am and he doesn’t judge me for thinking that Voyager is the best Star Trek season or because I was Princess Leah for three Halloween’s in a row when I was younger. Or that I can totally kick his ass at Unreal Tournament. *swoon*
5) He’s passionate. And I don’t mean in the sexual sense. (Well, that too) He is passionate about life, about what he believes in and about the things he loves to do. I’m jealous of that sometimes. But it’s rubbing off on me. 🙂
6) He stuck by me when I was a manic, depressed, crazy wench. And be believed that I could get better.
7) I laugh. Everyday. At my own expense. Because him making fun of me is the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. He’s the person that taught me to laugh at myself and best of all, to be able to appreciate the ability to do that.
I could really go on this way till my fingers can’t take it anymore. These are just a few of the things that I love, that I’m happy for, reasons that I think I’m lucky. Roses and chocolate are good, but knowing that I get to go home to the man of my dreams, my future husband, nothing compares to that…
Happy Valentines Day, Ben. (k)