This is the kind of post I look back on a year later and think, “Somebody give that girl a shot. QUICK.”

I shouldn’t write blog posts when I’m under the influence of ‘fucking annoyed’ but I’m going to anyway. And I’m going to bullet it because I’m being lazy and I CAN.

  • What is with the general bitchfest online lately? There are some particular people I’m referring to on twitter (and I’m pretty sure none of them read my blog so assume you AREN’T them) but I want to slap some of them across the face and tell them to just SHUT IT ALREADY. I’m not talking about general sickness or weather related blah but people who, for MONTHS ON END, have been all WOE IS ME, pitty me, tell me I’m going to be okay, pet me, pay attention to me. And I have the notion to stop following them but it’s like a bad car accident. You don’t want to look, you REALLY don’t but you CAN’T HELP IT. Part of you wants it to just END and the other part of you kind of finds it humorous to watch the train wreck.
  • I’ve gotten the notes already to get a video reply up to Allyson’s questions “What skill do you wish you had?” and “What is your favorite iPhone app (that I can also use on my iPod Touch)?” Notes you ask? Yes, notes because when I start to run through what I’m going to say in my head, before I know it I’ve listed off 42 apps and a backstory/info for each one because, ask me about my gadgets and I will TALK YOUR EAR OFF. So I’ve limited myself to THREE apps. THREE. It’s like having to choose which child I love more. Assuming I had more than one child which I don’t and based on my AppStore obsession it’s a good thing you can’t just download kids off the internet every time one looks pretty or fun or just because it’s FREE(!!) because then I’d have 42 kids. Anyway, I promise a video by this weekend.
  • Speaking of kids! Mine is fast on the road to making me gray and I’m getting bitter. She’s 10, being a young mom kinda rocks but having a 10 year old does NOT. That’s not true, there are a lot of fun moments, but the fun to OMG TWEEN ATTITUDE ratio is getting a bit out of control and OMG THE HOMEWORK. When you get pregnant nobody ever mentions the HOMEWORK. They mention the cute little fingers and toes, and the awesome first words, and the miraculous first steps but then suddenly they stop talking about how “sweet and cute” they are around 10 and I GET WHY. Because they’ve blocked it from memory. Or were just drowning the memories out of existence with lots of hard liquor.
  • Please don’t send me hate mail telling me what a horrible parent I am for not only talking about my child like she’s perfect and smart and responsible and sweet because I’m allowed to have my off days and this is one of them. If you do, I’m sending her to your house for a week. NOW WHAT!?
  • I was sick at the end of last week. BAD sick. Ben got sick Monday night and still is. BADDER than my BAD sick. Different than mine symptom wise. I’m developing his symptoms.
  • If a smallish mushroom cloud forms somewhere over the Bay Area in the next few days, don’t be alarmed, it’s just my head exploding.

And I think that’s it. I have more to write but HAPPIER, non bitchy stuff and I don’t want to taint the fantastic negativity of this post with it’s awesome googness and, people, IT’S GOOD.

Look for more tomorrow. 🙂

7 thoughts on “This is the kind of post I look back on a year later and think, “Somebody give that girl a shot. QUICK.”

  1. LOL @ everything above. I will keep the homework thing in mind – still a few years off of having kids, but I will remember this – Elephants never forget.

    Dunno if Seattle news would pick up on a mushroom cloud in CA, but I will let you know if it does so you can try to get more distance with the next one :):):)

  2. Regarding children, what goes around comes aroung, as they say! You think you’ve got it bad, remember that Jennifer has a 14 year old, a 13 year old and an 11 year old. Now that is KARMA!

    Also, as bad as it can get, as you are learning, we still LOVE our kids – funny how you can sometimes want to murder someone you love so much!

  3. Are you talking about helping with homework or some sort of homework you have to do? If you are talking about having to help with homework, I do know all about that. Peter has a nephew who basically never does his homework, because his dad starts to help, then basically does it because his son gets frustrated and starts crying. We’ve had multiple conversations about how we’re NOT going to do that. If not, what homework do you mean?!

  4. LOL!! That was great.

    The whole tween / teen thing freaks me out. If my behaviour during that time is any indication of what my son will be like I will be spending a lot of time in the office and possibly police station. :p

  5. If you haven’t done the video: note that I have an iPhone now, so if you love some apps that have no usefulness on the iPod Touch… you can include them now!

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