Katrina is just ravaging the South. Some of the pictures are incredible. And the death toll is already at 50+. With flood waters reaching 20+ feet people have lost EVERYTHING they own. I find it hard to wrap my mind around that. Leaving home and returning to… nothing but destruction. Having to start over with nothing but what you were able to pack into your car. It makes me feel so greedy for taking so much for granted.

Especially with Cassidy. I can’t imagine having to tell her that her cat is gone, or all of her toys and clothes.. and maybe even a friend or teacher. All the kids this has effected. It’s just.. horrible.

I boxed up four huge boxes of baby blankets, baby clothes, toys, shoes and clothes that Cassidy has outgrown in the last few years a few months ago when she was visiting her dad. I shoved them in her shower since it never gets used and was planning on taking them to the Good Will. Tomorrow I’m going to find a close Red Cross and over the next few days take all the stuff to them. It’s also about time I do a cleaning out of my closet because I have SO many shirts that I jsut NEVER wear so I’ll throw them in the boxes too. Hopefully it will find it’s way into the hands of a family that Katrina has left with nothing.

I wish we could afford to do more like donate money or even TIME there helping out… but at least this is SOMETHING.

Parking Idiots

After work today I went outside to see that some idiot had parked so close to my car in a brand new Volvo Stationwagon that CASSIDY would not have been able to squeeze through the door. This REALLY pissed me off. I stood there for a minute or two and tried to calm myself down. One of my co-workers walked up:

Girl: What the hell?! Was that car there at lunch?
Me: No.
Girl: What are you going to do?
Me: Well, I’m either keying the car before I crawl across the passenger seat or I’m crawling across then SLAMMING my door into his a few times.
Girl: *mouth gaping*
Me: Slamming my door into his will harm MY car though so I think I’ll just key it.
Girl: You should just tell *building managers name*. He’ll send out a mass email and say something over the PA system.
Me: Yeah, that would be the “politically correct” thing to do. But I’m a liberal. I don’t DO politically correct.
Girl: *looks scared* Well, good luck.

Now, I wasn’t really going to key his car. I would never do that. I WAS however going to get into my drivers side door and if that meant a nice big door ding on his brand new car I really didn’t care. As I stood there and contemplated how to squeeze myself into the door I see a man casually walking out into the parking lot and in my direction. He was looking from the car to me. I knew it was him so I folded my arms across my chest and put on the you-are-a-fucking-moron look:

Moron: Did I park you in?
Me: Well, yeah. Ya think? *looks at parking job*
Moron: I’ll only be a second.
Me: *dripping with sarcasm* Really? Well, gee thanks for hurrying.
Moron: *looks at me*
Me: Did you not see the THREE empty spaces next to the PASSENGER side of my car? *points to row of empty spots*
Moron: This spot was closer to the door.
Me: * @)(#@#($@#$@)#&%(#$&%#)(*$$%)(@&$#%@)#(%*
Moron: *gets in car, turns it on, rolls down window, changes chanel on radio*

This is where the blood in my veins started to boil steam came out of my ears and the whole world got this rosy red glow:

Me: *very loud* I’m not standing here to enjoy the summer heat, I have to pick my daughter up from school, do you think you could GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY!?!?
Him: *backs up and speeds out of praking lot while glaring at me*

Fucking hell people!!! How is it that some people are so damn oblivious to the fact that maybe OTHER PEOPLE exist in the world and they have lives to live too and maybe if you weren’t such an ASSHOLE your pathetic world would be a little nicer to live in? You know, karma?

I was really upset. I got his name. He’s a doctor. Tomorrow I’m getting a statement from Girl Co-worker and filing a complaint. This guy has a reputation as being a comlpete asshole to most of my co-workers but nobody ever actually files a complaint. I’m not a sheep though and I will make damn sure that I’m not treated like one.


Sunday night my mom, Cassidy, Ben, Cameron and I all went to PF Chang’s for dinner to celebrate the end of Cameron’s birthday weekend and gorge on lettuce wraps. My mom had a sweater she bought that was too big in the bust region and gave it to me. It is beige and knit and very preppy but is perfect for work since I’m always cold and wrapping up there.

I always ask Ben his opinion on new clothing. Mainly because his answers are always so cute… and honest. Which I love. If my ass looks like the backside of a school bus, he lets me know and saves us BOTH the embarrassment. This was not true of the sweater talk after which I spent a good 30 minutes online looking up untraceable poisons to slip into his next Pepsi:

Me: So, how do you like this sweater?
Ben: It’s nice.
Me: HA HA ! Really, what do you think of it?
Ben: It’s very conservative.
Me: *I knew he was going to say that!!*
Ben: And… Republican looking.
Me: *jaw hits floor*
Ben: *busy doing something*
Me: I have NEVER been SO OFFENDED in my ENTIRE life!!
Ben: Well…
Me: *throws sweater on couch*
Me: *stomps off to room pouting*

I took the sweater to work. Every time I put it on I feel dirty. All the girls at work love it.

Trying to prove that I’m not as bad as I sound on my blog.

I decided to research the search results a bit because for some reason I found them intriguing. And so you don’t all think I’m into watching child pornography and downing Epikak while scratching my back rash.

So here ya go:

Erik Bana – This is coming in from a google image search… There is a picture from an old blog post from May 16, 2004 that comes up on page 7. I had to laugh at the title of that blog post. heh

epikak – Comes from a post on August 13 2004 when somebody recommended it as pay back for somebody stealing my butter at work.

cherry layouts – Comes up as the #1 hit on Google’s Image search. And that’s embarrassing because it’s a horrid, awful, iframes layout.

child pornograhpy – Is from a post about The Butterfly Effect on December 8th, 2004. That movie ending still pisses me off. I ranted to Cameron today about it for a good half an hour.

fat lips – Page one of a Google Image search. From a post on October 18th, 2004.

back rash – Talking about Cassidy’s rash on May 31st, 2005. Which is funny because we have ANOTHER appointment tomorrow to see the doctor and this is one of the main things we will be discussing. They told me it should go away in a week with the medicine and it’s STILL there.

Search Results: July

Search results are weird. Nowhere is the word “depression” or “fuck”.


Top 20 of 131 Total Search Strings
# Hits Search String
1 22 7.69% eric bana
2 18 6.29% epikak
3 14 4.90% cherry layouts
4 11 3.85% dollhouse
5 11 3.85% hair color
6 8 2.80% aflux
7 7 2.45% cerulean dental spa
8 7 2.45% dermabond
9 6 2.10% a-flux
10 6 2.10% city of heroes
11 6 2.10% lindsey lohans hair color
12 6 2.10% two color hair
13 5 1.75% asuka langley
14 4 1.40% child pornograhpy
15 4 1.40% fat lips
16 4 1.40% franky johnny and luigi’s
17 3 1.05% back rash
18 3 1.05% bubble layouts
19 3 1.05% carrielee
20 3 1.05% coded layouts

Let down.

Fantastic day. Pictures and all that jazz tomorrow. Right now I’m too depressed.

The TiVo let me down for the first time today. It’s set to record all “new” episodes of Big Brother 6 (shut up). For the first time in a month of recording three shows a week, for some reason this week it didn’t. It WAS on at a special time because it’s a double elimination week but OMG the drama that’s started happening the last two weeks and I MISSED THE DOUBLE ELIMINATION WEEK EVICTION.

It was Jennifer and I KNEW it would be Jennifer but I so wanted to see Janelle call her a bitch on the way out the door. 🙁

To continue my reality TV rant… Why in the hell would you take a popular show like The Amazing Race and screw the format all up? This year instead of teams of two they will have families of four with kids as young as 8, 9 and 12!! I don’t see how this could make for a better race and really don’t see why they had to go and screw up the best reality TV show out there.


Happy Birthday, Cameron

My little brother, (who is now several inches taller than me, thus making the ‘I’m gonna kick your ass’ threats kinda of pathetic on my part) is 17 today. Next Tuesday he’ll be a junior in high school. That’s the year that I told the principal of my private catholic school to shove his school in an orifice of his body I don’t think proper catholics usually discuss and walked out of his office never to return. Hopefully he has as much fun the next two years as I did. :mrgreen:

One of the things I got him for his birthday is a bottle of “demi-permanent” BLACK hair dye. This present has two purposes. 1) Cause my mom undue stress and, 2) make Cameron the happiest 17 year old on Earth since my mom has always put her foot down when it comes to this. It’s gonna look awsome and there will be pictures.

We are spending most of the day at Great America so have a nice Saturday and I’ll catch ya later.

Crazy is as crazy does.

I’ve decided to take Kristen’s advise and see a counselor before going back to a psychologist again. I might need medicine again and I might not but I’d like to try the ‘not’ approach first.

The problem with this is that my HMO doesn’t cover “counseling”. So today I put my foot down and told the poor soul that happened to take the 5th call I’ve made in three days, “Look, you are either going to pay for me to see a counselor or in the next month you are going to have a very hefty bill from the psych ward at the hospital. Because I AM CRAZY. You can decide which you’d prefer to pay.”

They pre-authorized 10 visits. I know I’m not “crazy” but it’s amazing what depression can do to a person…

Anyway!! In other unrelated news: I finally got Cassidy’s PC set up in her room. Then Ben and I decided she needs a new case, a wireless PCI card, speakers, a chair, and I’m thinking a beanbag for when she want’s to watch movies on it. She and I are going to have a mommy/daughter geeky computer building day on Sunday.

We had a discussion today about how lucky she is to have her OWN computer in her bedroom at just under seven years old and how much responsibility comes along with it. And then I spent 2 hours researching parental control programs. Make it stop. Stop the growing of the child. For the sake of the crazy mom.


I finally got around to throwing up Cameron’s subdomain. I mainly did this so he can start showing off some artwork. By “throwing up” I mean I took a pre-made theme and made a nifty Marilyn Manson masthead for it then proceeded to butcher the code a bit to what I thought was better organization. I mean, who puts a search box at the TOP of a side bar?? Anyway…

http://www.aflux.net/paleo/ or click Cameron over there —>

Layout #17. Yes, 17.

So even though there are a few things I want to still work on, it’s live. I just couldn’t take the old extremely GAY LOOKING layout. It was fun. But it also gave me a headache.

Hope ya like it, there will be slight additions to content and some changing around of menu font’s and the such. I’ll let ya know as they happen.

Welcome to layout 17. May it have a longer, more wonderful, less nauseating life than the last.