Are you insensitive enough?

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So moms and people in general are all aflutter today with the current Time Magazine cover of a woman breastfeeding her 3 year old son. I’ve seen reactions range from “HIGHFIVE LADY” to “she should be ashamed what is her son going to think of this photo when he’s an adult”. I’m pretty sure Time did this for the reaction and it’s not hard right now to capitalize on the current trend of parenting styles ALL OVER THE INTERNET. The anti-vaxers, the anti-circumcision movement, the breastfeeding crusade, the cloth diaper swaps, the cosleeping coalition… it’s like a hippie’s dream.

Assuming your dream is to have a succubus stuck to you constantly for 18 years. Not my idea of fun. At all. Honestly, I think all this attachment parenting is going to guarantee that we raise the most codependent bunch of whiners we’ve ever seen. But that’s ANOTHER BLOG POST FOR ANOTHER DAY. LET THE HATE MAIL COME FORTH AND BLESS MY INBOX!

So about the cover. I really don’t have a problem with extended breastfeeding. I think it’s a decision that a family should make together. Do what works for THEM. You want to breastfeed your five year old? Go for it!

I really hate this cover though. But not for any of the reasons I’ve seen mentioned online yet. It’s not the picture, although it’s something that I’d never want, to stand there while my child is perfectly capable of grabbing a banana and eating it if he’s hungry, but because of what is implied in the text:

“ARE YOU MOM ENOUGH?”

Are you mom enough to do this? I hate the connotation that if you are worth anything as a mother, you will breastfeed till your child leaves for college. If you can’t or CHOOSE NOT TO breastfeed well then, you just aren’t MOM ENOUGH.

I’ve written about this before. I get really annoyed when I see parents are made to feel “less than” for a decision they’ve made. I get the appeal of attachment parenting but I do not get why a lot of the attachment parenters I see out there online feel the need to constantly shove their opinions and links and superiority complex and JUDGEMENT down your throat.

It’s mean and lame and STOP THAT.

JUST STOP.

*quietly steps off soapbox*

8 thoughts on “Are you insensitive enough?

  1. i really do agree with you on this. attachment parenting, while a personal decision, makes me a little leery… i want my kid to be independent, and i don’t think a lot of this attachment parenting is good to promote independence… sure my baby is gonna sleep in my room for a little while, because i’m going to be feeding him though the night and i really don’t want to have to go all the way to the other end of the house when i’m half asleep (not to mention it just doesn’t feel safe to me to have him so far away.) but as soon as he outgrows the cradle, he’s going into a crib, in his room.

    i do plan on breastfeeding for a while and i’ll be damn proud of myself if i can actually do it, but i honestly think this cover was offensive… because of the “are you mom enough” statement, and the fact that it was done for shock. and that causes people to come to really stupid conclusions about breastfeeding and especially extended breastfeeding.

    a friend of mine was actually told that breastfeeding was sexual abuse which set me off this morning…

  2. You’ve hit the nail on the head.
    Really I’m all for extended breastfeeding as well, but I think that after a certain age it should be pumped at possible. Most guys I know really don’t want to remember sucking on their moms chest, ya know?

  3. To be honest, when I first saw the thumbnail of the cover in my FB feed, I initially interpreted the last two words as “MOM, ENOUGH”. The image itself isn’t bad or what they’re doing. It’s just as you said, parents that have one way of doing something shouldn’t be made to feel “less than” by other parents who do it differently.

  4. Agree. I don’t care if someone wants to breastfeed their child until they are 18 because it doesn’t affect me one way or another. But to make it seem like one parenting style is better than another is complete bullshit. Mothers should be supportive of other mothers no matter what.

  5. I’m just not Mom ENOUGH according to the implications of this cover. That’s okay. I’m SUPER AWESOMESAUCE instead.

  6. I know Jamie Lynn (the mom on the cover) and she would never encourage the “Mommy Wars” that TIME has ignited. She’s a strong proponent of attachment parenting, etc., but she’d never tell anyone else that their way is wrong.

    The people calling it sexual abuse, etc. really bothers me. BREASTS AREN’T SIMPLY A SEX OBJECT. THEY’RE FOR FOOD.

    To each family his/her own. I think Jamie is awesome for doing this, knowing how controversial it was going to be.

  7. Yeah, the sexual abuse comments are ignorant. At BEST.

    I don’t really blame the moms here. I haven’t read the article yet, so I don’t know a lot about them personally. I place the blame here on Time who finally noticed a long running hot button issue on the web and capitalized on it.

    That headline was just crass and lame and I realize that was just some editor out there trying to sell issues.

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