WIRtW: (0005) Water Wars

When I Rule the World, if you walk out of the break room after having drained the VERY LAST DROPS of water out of the dispenser and don’t:

1) Put a new jug on yourself, or
2) ASK SOMEBODY that has more upper body strength than a FIVE YEAR OLD to do it for you,

You will be banned forthwith from EVER DRINKING WATER AGAIN YOU LAZY FUCKING ASSHOLE.

Also:

“I’m a girl” is not a reason not to change the water. It’s a bullshit cop out that further promotes the fact that women are helpless pussies that might BREAK IN HALF under the weight of a 40 pound jug of water. Seriously. I’ve seen the purses you all carry around on those fragile little arms so just don’t go there.

You may view all of my rule changes here.

10 thoughts on “WIRtW: (0005) Water Wars

  1. SO since I’m here and totally off the subject please share your thoughts on BB so far. Like last night’s episode and what you think about it what went down with the Offbeats and the one guy? I was so livid during it for so many varying reasons I couldn’t even stand it.

  2. Ugh, that would really piss me the hell off. I dealt with that crap when I worked retail and fast food. It’s sad that you’re dealing with it in a corporate office!

  3. That sucks. I always change the water cooler here, but then again I also use it the most. Of course now I have to ask others to do it for me since I’m pregnant. I hate waiting for other people to take care of things though. *shakes fist*

  4. Hahaha, I love you Anna. That sounds very frustrating. I always fill things up when I’ve used the last one. Even here in my house, I fill up our Brita water every time I take a glass of water.

  5. Waiting to hear about the sign you (should have) put up, lamenated, in very large font that will read:

    “Use the last Water, Grab some Jugs”

    (With a picture of boobs on it)

  6. @Ranee: I was planning on doing a weekly BB post. I’ll probably have on up tonight or tomorrow.

    @Jenn: It is SO FRUSTRATING. Especially since this time I was standing behind the girl and going to get water when she was done. She emptied EVERY LAST DROP out into her mug then just turned and WALKED OUT! When I went to get water and realized it was ALL GONE, my head just about exploded.

    @Erin: Being pregnant is a GOOD EXCUSE!

    @Caity: You’d think that kind of common sense would apply to a bunch of ADULTS. It’s insane how self obsessed a lot of the women I work with are.

    @MyCrazyHusband: You know Ben, not EVERY problem can be fixed with boobs. MOST! But not ALL. 😛

  7. What if you made it so everyone had free healthcare, holidays were week long celebrations, and bartering would be a perfectly acceptible way to do business?

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