How every boss should be

Our company recently started monitoring even our AOL instant Messenger Chats using a new service called “Akonix L7” (feel free to google). It basically logs everything you and your chat partner say. On the first outbound message to someone, they’ll receive a notice as described below. Some may say, well, that’s infringing on our personal privacy!!! But, this is company equipment, and as such, company internet, so, they have every right to do what they are doing. However, this email exchange below HAD to be posted (grin)…

One of my coworkers recently posted this to our group about it:
“…..I’m sure we have had possible email and IM monitoring for some time now but just recently others are getting messages about it when talking to me on various IM programs. The standard message says something like: “Administrator: Your communications are being monitored by the Akonix L7 system managing the person with whom you are connected.” Just a friendly FYI for those who discuss personal things over IM. I would be careful about what you share over IM if you don’t want others to possibly know :)….”

To which my boss responded:
“….Yes, we’ve been monitoring all of your communications for a couple of years. Managers get logs of every IM, chat or e-mail conversation you have on company equipment. But since you guys are spending most of your time chatting online, there is no way for me to sift throught he thousands of logs I get each day on you all. So I have to filter the logs for key words or phrases. Right now I only look for a few things. If the communication contains any of the following, the system flags them for me so I can investigate:

“I am giving this information to ATI”
“I hate my boss”
“I am going to come in on Sunday night and change all of the picks on the board” (*)
“How much can I make at your company”
“?????? is gay, not that there is anything wrong with that”
“I’m going to call in sick tomorrow so I can take my car to the track”
“I am going to go postal”
“George W. Bush is the best thing that ever happened to this country”
“How do I get to the next level in WoW?”

Even with this limited number of phrases, I can’t keep up with all the logs that get flagged, so you all my be safe for now.


* Some lab folks exchange opinions and money on sports events

Three of the of the folks in the lab take their cars to the track, some are really into Seinfeld, some play World of Warcraft…, he truly is… the coolest boss ever.

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