The below rant is about none of my regular visitors. Just something I needed to get out there…
Why is it people are so apprehensive when it comes to admitting fault in a distressing situation? Even better, why are people this way when the situation puts the blame squarely on the shoulders of an innocent friend? What’s really sad is that I bet most people reading this know a person they probably aren’t friends with anymore, or even had a friend they are just aquaintances with now because of this question.
When this happens people tend to try and mask an issue or find a way to NOT admit something really simple and silly by pointing fingers, slinging mud and skirting around the issue so many ways that by the time you get to the end, the original point is so far lost and you are in such a state of “defend” that the water under the bridge has turned into a raging, destructive flood of horse shit.
I understand that people have “stuff” they have to deal with on a daily basis. Stuff that is scarry, stressful, time-consuming, sad… we ALL have these things going on. All if us. Friendship is not about lashing out at somebody an expecting them to just KNOW that all this stuff is going on and that’s why you are saying things and acting in a way that maybe you wouldn’t under “normal” conditions. It’s, frankly, a bullshit excuse. I say this because there’s nothing YOU are going through that SOMEBODY else around you has NOT gone through. It doens’t make it any more or less okay for you to be a dickhead than it does the next person.
Now, excuse me while I get “blunt”. You get back what you give out. If you want people to keep in touch and spend time with you pick up a damn phone every now and then and don’t expect that a person with a six year old is going to jump up at 9:00PM for a late night dinner. When people invite you places, don’t be such a fucking snob and refuse to go to a certain movie theatre because it’s in the “ghetto” or because it’s farther away than the one by your house… where we saw the last three movies. Understand that by hanging out with friends that are not YOU, you are not getting “replaced” or “ignored”. Maybe instead realize that you’ve been so “busy” with your own “stuff” that maybe your friends have found friends that are more into the stuff they happen to be into. If you can’t “share” your friends then you aren’t a very good friend to begin with.
And MOST OF ALL! When you act like an ass, don’t use all of these reasons to try and dance around the bigger issue… That you were an ass.